I got married in 2016 and my husband and I agreed that we would like to have babies immediately, so from then on we stopped using condoms. I was naive, I thought that if we decided to have babies and go unprotected then I would get pregnant immediately, or max within 3 months because with the Rhythm Method you can predict your ovulation quite precisely and if you time the intercourse well then it must happen. Or not?
Not. We had been trying for 6 months unsuccessfully when one of my friends told me about some fertility awareness thing and observing cervical fluid and recommended a Facebook group. I joined the group and I had to realize that till then I had known ridiculously little about how my body and my fertility works. I immediately ordered a book that they recommended in the group and a basal body thermometer and I dived into Fertility Awareness and cycle charting.
It might not be surprising that in the 3rd month of charting my cycles our first baby conceived, 9 months after the wedding. You can imagine our happiness, I tested on 3 consecutive days because I was doubtful at first, I thought it might be a false positive. I still had 4 days to go till my (not) expected periods, but I had weird cramps and breast pain and my friend who has 3 kids said they might be early pregnancy symptoms. Seeing the test results we immediately shared the happy news with our family and close friends.
I knew that the ultrasound would not show anything this early, so we were planning to visit the doctor in the 6th week. Till then I thought of passing time by checking baby clothes and furniture online, it never occurred to me that anything could go wrong. I downloaded a pregnancy tracker app on my phone, I read the articles every day and I drooled over the poppy seed and the sesame seed that showed how big the baby was in those weeks and we took a "belly" photo of the 4th and 5th week that would be made into a slide show by the app at the end of the pregnancy.
At the end of the 5th week, however, something happened that none of us expected. I started bleeding. Not much, just spotting, but even an inexperienced mummy-to-be would know that vaginal bleeding during pregnancy is not a good sign at all. The friend I mentioned earlier confirmed my suspicions and suggested visiting the doctor immediately. At the hospital the ultrasound technician could not see anything in my uterus and she kept asking me if I was sure I was pregnant, I confirmed it again and again but she didn't want to believe me. The gynecologist was also doubtful so she sent me for a blood test to check the hCG hormone level that verified my statement. She asked to repeat the blood test after 2 days to see if the hormone level doubles, if it does then there might not be any problem after all. I sat home for 2 days wishing it to double. I still had no idea about what was going on. Seeing the second blood test result, the gynecologist sent me back for ultrasound to find that baby because it must exist. It did. Only not where it was supposed to be. They found it implanted into my left Fallopian tube, it was already big enough to stretch the wall of the tube to break-point. I had two options: either getting injections weekly that would induce miscarriage, followed by blood tests, but doubtful if it would work at all, or I go for surgery. I didn't need to think much, I chose surgery. I can't stand needles, I hate blood tests, during the surgery at least I would be asleep, not knowing and not feeling anything and it would be over much faster. I got admitted to the hospital next day around noon, the surgery started at 5 pm.
It was a laparoscopic procedure. As they informed me afterwards, they were only planning to suck the embryo out of the tube but by that time it was so big that the wall started to break, leaving no choice but to cut that part of the tube out, otherwise there would have been a great chance for it to happen again. Due to this the surgery went longer than they anticipated and they had not put me to sleep well enough, I woke up in between. I felt them working on my belly, I saw the lights, I heard the voices and I could not breathe from the tube in my throat. I remember wishing I would die then and there along with my baby. Of course they put me back to sleep quickly but I did not feel any better even after hours, lying in my hospital bed. My husband told me what happened, that they needed to remove part of the tube and I felt the world end. Not only they tore my first, so awaited baby out of me but they also reduced my chances of getting pregnant again by 50%.
Eventually though, as the days went by, I realized that my poor baby had no chance at all and at least it did not take me along so I should be glad. My doctor was amazed that I had known about my pregnancy so early, here, in India many times women don't realize that they are expecting even in the 3rd month, therefore those for whom the embryo implants outside the uterus don't get diagnosed in time, their tube breaks causing internal bleeding and unconsciousness, they are taken to the hospital by emergency ambulance and the doctors have to fight for their lives. She almost congratulated me for being so conscious and reading the signs of my body so well, and she thanked me for her first "calm surgery" experience. This was so absurd that eventually it started to make me feel better.
But why have I told you all this? First, because it allows me to finally close this chapter of my life and second, because it might be useful for you. I have been thinking a lot ever since, I believe that everything happens for a reason and if I had not familiarized myself with Fertility Awareness and not started charting my cycles before, I might have not survived, thinking that the spotting was just the beginning of a late period that does not require a visit to the doctor.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that if you don't chart your cycles then horrible things will happen to you. I believe that, thanks to Fertility Awareness, knowing exactly what was going on in my body and realizing when something was wrong saved my life. But this is my story.
The next article, following this topic, will be about ectopic pregnancy, chances of occurrence, types, symptoms and treatment, I hope you will find it useful. Share your thoughts or questions in the comment section below. I have not included some details about the doctors' attitude, there will be a separate post about that (not generalizing, only personal experiences).
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